Psalm 23 (Revised)

Dieter's Prayer

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.

He maketh me lie down and go push ups,

He giveth me sodium-free bread,

He restoreth my waistline,

He leadeth me past the refrigerator for mine own sake.

He maketh me partake of broccoli instead of potatoes,

He leadeth me past the pizzeria;

Yea, though I walk through the bakery,

I shall not falter, for Thou Art with me,

With diet colas I am comforted.

Thou preparest a diet for me in the presence of my enemies. Thou anointest my lettuce with low - cal olive oil. My cup will never overflow.

Surely Ry-Krisp and D-Zerta shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall live with the pangs of hunger forever. Amen.